I know I chose this expectantly,willingly and more than anything with a sigh of relief but I so wish it wasn't this hard. I wish each day did not seem to pass by agonisingly, so slowly with me questioning myself all the time. I wish things fell into place and this wasn't all higgledy piggledy.I wish this wasn't only about work but it is so . I wish I had something to distract myself with but i don't. I wish I find my rhythm soon and settle down cos I hate this feeling of not belonging anywhere.
7 comments:
I can only tell you this, you will get there, you will find the rhythm in the madness, but yeah the journey is going to be long and hard...i am sorry for sounding preachy. As i approach first anniversary in this town, i can only say i am still coping but it doesn't seem so hard.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Stick with it for a bit it will toughen you up and then one day when they love you and can't do without you Bam! kick them in the nuts and leave.
There's light at the end of the tunnel you just got to believe it
Each in our own way we are all outsiders, even in our own homes.. this is a cause for sadness as you find now, but its also not a bad thing - it means that its that much easier to make anyplace a home, all it takes is one thing to fit right. Have faith and a little patience, things have a strange way of taking you to the right choice..
then, its all up to you.
and listen to bananafish's nietsche quote above, its one of the greatest truism's ever.
Take care.
you belong all right...you belong to your people, your writings, your hopes and above all yourself...
Scribblers Inc.
P.S.- Despair not, for the end is near...
type with font 8 is it?? hmmm I type within an official document,or type out my personal mails there and cut copy paste :-)
hey jude...
take a sad song and make it better :)
Utopia I hv felt this way too..many times. Then I realised that the only place I belong to is my heart...cos thats where my home is.
btw I hv been away from blogville too...and tho Im bak, it's all going pretty slow...snail pace. Im so not in the mood these days...feeling really sad after the Mumbai attacks.
TC n HUGS!
Keshi.
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