Nov 18, 2008

Didn't I know how to save a life?


This clearly is no time to be blogging at 12: 20 in the afternoon but hell I have some hundred something documents that I have to go through and I do not feel like doing such insipid work right now. So here I am having reduced my font size to a measly 8 and typing away to glory. The lengths we go to hahhaha! Oh and my Boss keeps getting these funny phone calls cos apparently his number use to be some BPO called Zingo BPO’S before and he is livid every time they call him up saying “ Is this Zingo BPO?” I don’t why but the three of us find it hard keeping our laughter at bay cos Zingo sounds a tad bit funny and this is a law firm at the end of the day and when he gets these phone calls right in the middle of a meeting with some client it is quite disconcerting for him. As of now we are sending a legal notice to Airtel to stop these annoying phone calls or we’ll sue them hahaha!
I have been spending a lot of time alone. I am dead tired by the end of the day and don’t have the strength in me to indulge in other activities but to get home, read for a bit and hit the sack. I haven’t slept so much in the longest time. In Delhi I use to be eternally sleep deprived and here I sleep a minimum of 8 hours but alas when I get up each morning it is almost like I partied till the wee hours of the morning and just got up. What’s with me? Sigh. Oh and I walk for miles altogether. I haven’t made use of my legs half so much in the recent years after having left Pune. Everytime I head to Offiice or back home after work I take a different route cos I want to be familiar with the lanes and bylanes and the houses are so pretty, like dolls houses and the roads are tree lined avenues. I love the weather and yes after Delhi the weather over here is soothing on the nerves.
I have been thinking a lot lately. Well that sounds silly but generally I have been introspecting and I have come to the conclusion that I guess I did run away from circumstances and the situation that had built itself over a course of almost two years. I mean I got the job and saw a way out of the self made disaster and misery. I know I made my life out there sound almost like one long party in this blog. If I want to look back and feel nostalgic it is so easy to think that it was one looooonnnggg party but that is not what it was all about. I am not in talking terms with a lot of people I have mentioned before on this blog. I miss them and I question myself sometimes wondering where did I go wrong. It must be me or was it them or just us?
They aren’t playing any role in my life today but there was a time when my life centred around them and I have to pinch myself to make myself believe that no they had been there, we did have the best of times, that it was real and not a dream. I have no regrets whatsoever. I am at peace over here cos the biggest sign being I am comfortable being alone except once in a while when I call up She and cry cos I had to watch a movie alone or when a certain Bananafish called and I burst into tears cos as usal I had 500 documents to review hahah! Thank you btw! And I am pissed with Hazel Eyes for not having called me this weekend. I am use to talking to you but I’ll never say so. Hmphhhhh! And I do wanna meet you even if I emphatically denied the same to Batty Woman saying you don’t make a difference cos in the strangest of ways you do. You know that and I knew that a long time back.

7 comments:

BananaFish said...

This Bananafish chap sounds like a real amazing person

She said...

Lowe you woman. I hope watching a gay movie alone was a nice experience. Since you are on the lookout, keep an eye out for some cute boys for me too!

Anansi said...

Bangalore does that to you... I also started thinking a lot when I was there and it helped me sort out stuff.. hope it does the same for you! Whenever you feel blue gather a crowd and go take full advantage of the ladies night at The Beach or Athena :D

And isn't it such a cute picturesque little place?

The Dude said...

I know how you feel utopia, and having moved back to delhi a couple of months ago and started working again, Im finding life so strange..
now Im not socialising but am sleeping about 8 hours a night (which is WAY more than I was used to!) and in the morning feel like a zombie..
then the other day I was woken up at 4am by my dog whining and Id only been asleep about 3 hours and I was fine!
.. hmm.. me thinks it might be a unique condition to many of this generation.. a mutational ability.. evolutionary change.. who know?
anyhow, I know how you feel, dont worry though, it can only get better.
Cheers..

Anonymous said...

It's going to be a year since I moved to Bangalore! I also ran away from things and people. I cried a lot, watched plenty of movies alone... had a terrible boss and so on... life worked itself out... i now come home to be alone and relax... we all get there Pri, it's just a matter of time and of course the weather in this city is the best! Just so you know there are people in this town who care about you and are just a text/call away :)

Scribblers Inc said...

Ki holo baba! Enjoy maadi! :D

Scribblers Inc.

P.S.-I bet you understand that by now! On a serious note, WASSSSSUP!! :D

The Dude said...

hey utopia, howd you get automatic music on your blog?
Ive been trying to that for awhile! pls let me know how!!