And we hit rick bottom the harder we try. All the happiness is sucked out. We cry and cry and cry. We haven't cried this much for years now. Friends have come and gone, fights and misunderstandings flit pass by, we have lost files and found them too, fallen in love and fallen out of it, shifted cities, jobs, lives and not once but time and time again, lost faith and found it back almost miraculously and more than anything we have lived through it all. Then why does this feel like the end of the world?I wanna be happy. I wanna get up each morning knowing that it is gonna be a good day and that I won't question my abilities some million times a day. I seem to be loosing belief in my own abilities and today I even asked my Mum if I was that bad a lawyer. I hateeeeee that, hate it from the deepest core of my heart. So i take a pledge that hell I am gonna make it, come anything. I am gonna play by your rules and be bloody good at it. I might stumble and fall but I am gonna get up again and try once more till I master it and I promise this to myself. I am not gonna be this crying, wimpering wuss whose eyes get filled up with tears at one harsh word. Times will change and someday we shall look back and laugh at this day and know that yes we made it through this and we can make it through anything.