Sep 16, 2013

On today because it is far from being a fairytale

Last night when I finally finished my quota of 1000 words actually 1100 words per day of my PIL research paper I looked at the time and it was 11:10 PM. I was told by Sans on Skype that I should call it a day. I was hesitant initially thinking well I won't write anymore but let me read something from another module. I opened the China-Asean Air Services Agreement to read but left it after superficially skimming through the document. I had to unwind. I had been sitting from 1 in the afternoon and my grey cells had actually gone on the sleep mode.

Even a short span of 10 months at Grad School isn't lacking drama given that the kids from India who are my contemporaries here are already knee deep in petty politics and hard core back biting. I don't miss being a part of all this. Haha! It is such fun being the bystander and watch them get harassed over such trivialities. It is hilarious how us Indians carry a bit of India with us wherever we go.

So last night I switched my Kindle on and read a bit of Julie and Julia. Julie was in her 30th year when she took the challenge of making 524 of Julia Child's recipes in 365 days and maintain a blog of it. This was way back in 2002. I tried to find similarities between the protagonist and me just to inspire myself saying if Julie could make 524 of those complicated french dishes in 365 days then I can also finish all my papers and assignments on time. Alas the only similarity between us is the age and the desire to do something different besides the daily monotony of life.

My life is hardly monotonous now. Hmmmm okay yes reading all the time and writing is monotonous but I am not stuck somewhere I didn't wanna be. It'll get over before I know it in 8 and a half months. I have my panic moments almost everyday when I am convinced my writing is going nowhere and there isn't any flow of thought and coherence is too much to ask for. I don't think about my grades because it is pointless. I don't know how this is gonna be. Some days I console myself saying there is only so much stress you can take in one day so don't lose hope. This is the worst it can get for today.

Today I am going to the library and studying. I need some human interaction today which is beyond whatsapp voice notes, skype and viber.

If today was a fairytale it would be 11th May, 2014 all my 10 modules would be over and I would have successfully completed 40 credits required to get that LLM degree. I would have finished all assignments, papers, moots, exams without any setbacks but for the regular panicking. If only today was that fairytale. 

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