Jun 22, 2011


In House Legal “Boring” Counsel. I suddenly thought of adding “boring” to the entire term last morning sometime amidst piles of work. Bleargggghhhh! I am thoroughly bored substantial part of the week and the weekends pass away like the blink of an eyelid and woooosssh it is Monday again. That feeling of life being perennially Monday is so agonizing. I need a change rather I want a change. I am tired of seeing the same people at office day after day. I so know that once I get that change I’ll miss these people but even then. I am tired of it all. The city, the people, mundane life. I wonder how we manage to spend years and years doing the same thing and living the same lives. I remember that feeling of being trapped sometime in Pune in my second year there. There were more than 3 years ahead but hell I couldn’t wait for it to get over. Once college got over I couldn’t wait to start working and once I started working I couldn’t wait to get a fancier job or study some more. The longest time I have spent in a city is Kolkata which would be 8 years of my life and then Pune which was 5 whole growing up years as I danced my way from teens to my twenties and then its been a large helping of Delhi, a touch of Chennai , a dash of Bangalore and Kolkata sprinkled here and there. Kolkata will always be sprinkled here and there. :-) What is bothering me right now in this entire concoction is the overly generous helpings of Delhi. I am done with this place now.

When does that feeling of “I want my roots here to this place” set in? How do you realize this is the city that you want to have a house in, raise kids and live a life in? Maybe because I don’t have all these bindings of a relationship hence I do not feel rooted to any place at all. Home is Kolkata and that is that. But with other cities I have mostly have either a very detached relationship or a love hate relationship like Delhi now. I was very very detached with Pune. I probably spent the better part of my young adulthood there but the only reason I ever go back there is cos a very dear friend of mind stays there. I never feel passionate about living in any city like some people swear by the places they live in. Is it a sign of my restlessness of finding that one place I know I can see myself live the rest of my life and even if its alone I would be able to dwell in it perfectly content alone. Yeah I need to find that place soon, in the next couple of years. I pray I do so.

1 comment:

Pesto Sauce said...

You are very lucky to have lived in different places, so many people I meet these days have lived in a single city in India and find it hard to adjust abroad. Yes settling down in a place is important but for that stability in life is a must