Feb 13, 2010
Secret Society of Happy People :-)
Secret Society for Happy People it seems.Yes yes there is such a Society and I happened to chance upon them while reading a funny article on USA Today about how people are programmed to be happier on weekends and given my current phase of “I wanna be happy by myself” and “I am not gonna feel bad about this unwelcome loneliness” that I was tempted to check out their website and some of the stuff they said actually made so much of sense. For instance :-
Purpose: The Secret Society of Happy People encourages the expression of happiness and discourages parade-raining. Parade-rainers are those people who don't want to hear your happy news. And no, we don't tell people to be happy if they aren't or how to be happy.
Mission: To help you create a happier lifestyle.
Motto: If you're happy and you know it ... tell somebody!
Members: Thousands from around the world.
I know all of this sounds so cheesy but maybe this is also about inspiring myself each day to count all my blessings, to do one small thing that could possible make me happy or take those tiny steps towards the happy ending. Believe me it really helps because happiness isn’t a permanent state of mind like all of us have realized but once you achieve it maybe we have to work hard enough to maintain it. The tiniest of things make a difference like yesterday I met Batty’s friend Becky for lunch and we were meeting up after 2 years and he hasn’t been my closest buddy yet he greeted me so warmly and those 2 hours passed away happily gorging on ham sandwiches and French fries at the United Coffee House talking about life, love, work, travelling, quirks etc.
I read a blog post recently that talked about loneliness and that no man is an island and we should reach out to our fellow beings when you find loneliness consuming you and that is what has started happening to me. Though a couple of days back it hit me that damn if I keep behaving the way I am and keep feeling bad about myself that I landed up in Delhi minus all the older perks of a huge circle of friends, a lovely house and someone to go out with anytime I want to then all I shall do is to keep wallowing in self-pity. Nobody is gonna come rescue me from my present state in life. Besides I don’t even need rescuing. It isn’t gonna be an easy ride all the time and sometimes we need to get out of your comfort zone and just call people saying “Hey you wanna meet up for a drink?” or “Hey what about catching for lunch this Sunday?”.
I have never ever been short of friends and I always thanked God for that but suddenly I find myself all alone in the same city where once upon a time I was surrounded with people. I don’t remember feeling friendless even for a fraction of a second those 2 years in Delhi and all I remember from last month is getting up in the morning and wondering okie so what do we do today after work? Well we come back home and sit on the net, hmmmm read for a while, talk on the phone and maybe sit on the net for some more time and hmmm talk some more on the phone… And when you are feeling the way I had been feeling you almost hate it when your friends come up with suggestions like go mix with new people, make new friends or even better find a hobby, go explore the city, do something you love. Honestly one feels like giving ONE TIGHT SLAP to them cos they aren’t in your shoes and it is very easy for them to say so. But on hind sight they do make sense just that it is easier said than done.
At the end of the day you are the only one that can help yourself out. People can lead you towards a particular way but it is up to you to follow it. Hence the bottom line being you have to find ways to make yourself happy and if it means going and catching that soppy romantic movie alone then do so. I did that yesterday. I actually went and saw “Valentine’s Day” alone and I was the only person not in a group watching the movie but loved it and I wouldn’t have missed a Gary Marshall movie. I am glad I went ahead and saw it instead of waiting around for people to come with me and see it. I am even making that extra effort with strangers like Finoo’s friend Mr. Morgan Stanley who apparently is socially inept. Hahaha! Not a problem I went ahead and messaged and made a plan. I even called up my old friend Pixie from Bangalore whom I hadn’t been too nice to that time rather I’d been indifferent but she was so warm and sweet saying that she’ll make a plan and I have to come out with her and even asked me to stay over with her in Gurgaon at night cos Dwarka is unsafe. I felt like such a jerk cos one time in B’lore I had been downright mean to her and she hadn’t wanted to drive back to Brigade road after a particularly exhausting evening and I didn’t even suggest that she could spend the night at my place. Oh I even got back in touch with this blogger pal of mine whose office use to be 2 buildings away and we had been soooo surprised and met up for chai at a tapri. Guess we’ll be meeting up real soon.
I promise myself that I shall visit one new place every month even if it means going of alone cos maybe all my life I took travelling as a part and parcel of my ordinary wandering life since I come from an army background and someone told me that nothing like seeing new places and observing different lives to take your mind off trivial things like irritating colleaugues, bosses, deadlines and of course heartbreaks. I shall not ditch Miss Touch Me Not or Preema as and when they make plans. If I have to make that extra effort to go hang out with them or travel that extra mile to meet them then I shall do so because you know what I like having people around and all these years maybe I took it for granted but now as I get older it strikes me that I won’t always be encircled with people who’ll love me for me and wanna hang out with me all the time or make plans with me excitedly. Growing older is also realizing the value of your friends and family. Sometimes I don’t believe that this is me sans a social life but hell who cares as long as you get to hang around with someone funny over drinks in the evening. Hmmmm so these are my rather feeble attempts at being happy.What say?;-) So do you wanna make frandship with me? :p
I've been roaming around, I was looking down at all I see
Painted faces fill the places I can't reach
You know that I could use somebody
You know that I could use somebody
Kings of Leon:Use Somebody