If you do leave

             Painting-Branches of an Almond Tree in Blossom by Vincent Van Gogh

 I asked myself am I doing all of this just for you. I am doing up my house bit by bit, day by day, weekend by weekend, spending hours conjuring up the exact shade of orangish yellow that the curtains should be and wondering where can I get the best deal with the lamp shades, checking up flee stores for that perfect coffee table and how I wanted only the warmest colours for the rug in the living room. I wanted a mirror too. The prettiest mirror for my mirror less bedroom. Was I about to do all of this just for you? Am I gonna decorate the only two  rooms that I use in my large apartment, in anticipation of your coming visit and if things fall apart am I gonna look around at all these vibrant colours surrounding me and these mint fresh new things that’ll fill up the empty spaces in my house and feel it was all in vain? Can new things fill up the empty spaces in your heart and when people leave do the spaces only become more vast?  Am I gonna land up with a whole new bunch of bric bracs but an even emptier space inside my heart if you do leave?