Aug 29, 2007

First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you. ~

Ahem a vice called alcohol. Well think I am the last person who should actually be talking about alcohol considering the fact that I didn’t start drinking until I was quite old. Na I never got drunk during my first few years in college. On the contrary I was the one who hadn't had a drop of alcohol ever. Everyone would be drinking, making merry and be all happy while I was the one who was completely under the iron controls of sanity and my senses would be wide alert doing a double take. All those years I’d wonder what makes my friends act giggly and even mellow after drinking. Strange as it sounds I didn’t even try experimenting as most young college goers would until much later well into my early twenties. However I’d be lying if I do not accept that sometimes I’d actually feel a little out of place because so many inebriated people around you when one is in a solemn state of mind does make you wish that you could feel the same. I’d have a few sips here and a few sips there and make faces like a child does and say "Arghhhhhhh".
But there were intoxicants I did try eventually. On my 20th birthday I got stoned for the first time in my life and wow that was such a hilarious trip I. I can still hear myself screaming “whoopsie daisies” at the top of my voice and the look on the faces of my surprised friends. No one had ever seen me inebriated before. I didn’t hear the end of it for the next few years. After that day I’d smoke up once in a while and enjoy my hiatus to the other world. I remember the craving for anything sweet after we were stoned and also a particular incident when this guy I smoked up with got me chocolate at 1 at night just to satisfy my sweet tooth. Those were heady days; we were students, perennially broke and counting pennies all the time. Maybe it was the state of our minds at that time in our lives that made us want to try weed and the likes of it. I recollect a time when I had one too many a joint and it was a wild, crazy trip when I felt I was flying. I remember distinctly lying on my bed and that uplifted feeling as if the bed was soaring high into the sky like Alladin’s magic carpet ( now I know that it definitely wouldn’t be as much fun as it does look like in the animated film)and I was praying to god so hard saying “Please please I promise not to smoke up for a long long time .”

I didn’t touch weed after that for a while. The next time when I did start smoking up was a hard time in my life when I was trying to put a part of my past behind. Weed was my way out, made me forget those feelings that didn’t seem to go away in the light of the day, feelings that haunted me and made life miserable for me. So I’d smoke a joint everyday at night and go to sleep with this heightened sense of superficial happiness that faded away in the brightness of the morning sunshine and made me feel all hollow and empty from inside. I’d do that day after day, I’d be all cuckoo at night and in the morning I’d be in tears trying to hide my sobs under the quilt. That phase of mine ended too when one fine day I confessed to my Mum about how dejected I was and she took it so well. She asked me to stop and come home for a bit. By the time I came back I was a different person. I realized smoking up was never the answer. I’ve seen too many people destroy their lives due to their addiction to weed. I’ve seen the smartest of men just waste them selves doing substances.

Drinking on the other hand has been amusing. Drunken soiress can be quite comical.Yeah sometimes I do drink a wee bit too much and I am woozy and happy and such a kid. The last party we had just before we graduated was a lively affair and I was so drunk, I’d been drinking with my best friend and her boyfriend and and I was on top of the world, rather the zenith. I gave a peck on the cheek to all the guys in the pub that night needless to say the next afternoon when I bumped into a few of them they had those secret smiles on their faces. I felt sooooo silly. I refrain from acting in such a ridiculous manner now but darn I do fail every once in a while. I have to mention all those phone calls one makes to your loved one(one sided) under the influence of alcohol. Damn in the recent past everytime I have done so all I have heard from the other side of the line is "You are drunk again.Don't drink too much.What is wrong with you? What are you doing with your life?"Huh!Where did that come from? My life is going on mighty fine. Thank you but your concern is totally not needed.I resent him for making me sound like an alcoholic.Men give themselves entirely too much credit.Seriously it isn't always traumatic as they would like to believe. I might be the cocktail queen , what with my fixation with bloody mary's, mojitos and strawberry daiqris in different periods and very recently my love for wine but hell i ain't no alcoholic.

Who can ever forget the drunken singing, the drunken bonding, the confessions et al. It is another story that in the morning one would get up and all of that would appear downright ludicrous hahah! I took a sabbatical from drinking in the middle and apparently I’d become quite spiritless and stodgy according to my roomie. No body is as cute and entertaining ( in a nice way mind you) as me when drunk so I don’t deprive my friends anymore. Cheers to all of you :).

Now, I just want to play on my panpipes,
I just want to drink me some wine,
As soon as you’re born, you start dying,
So you might as well have a good time


Drama Div@ said...

Personally, I'm a social drinker... I drink occasionally but not too much, i stopped before i wasn't able to. I find it more interesting to watch other people make complete asses of themselves. It may be mean to say, but drunk people are some of the funniest people to watch. So try to be sober and the watcher is a big benefit!! :D

Rajeev said...

The first time i had alcohol was back when I was in 8th grade! and got scoldings frm dad for doing that at that age! :P but now, things have changed! Never knew my dad was sucha a nice person! ;)
hehehe! :D
I hate smoking tho. never felt like doin it till now! :D

peace & love

anjan said...

CHEERS!!!! Hee hee :D

(¯`•._.•[Raaji]•._.•´¯) said...

cool post. I don't drink and neither did i have a temptation to drink. In fact there are times when you really don't want to see some of your really good friends, acting really weird. and being the only sober 0ne, you have to take care of them too.
Oh well, alcohol dominates the social scene where i live; so i dont really have a choice other than not drinking myself.

wacko said...

wah..sounds like 'memoirs of a weedster' :P

all those phone calls and smses after getting drunk are so memorable...

i hvnt tried weed. i so wanna do it once but am sure drinkin is beatific!

cheers! and thnks for dropping by!

Anansi said...

men are really holier than thou when women get drunk.. either it's this poor lonely girl attitude or it's the omigod what a wanton alcoholic attitude. Give me a break! Haven't seen you around in blogosphere for a while!

Renovatio said...

Personally, I've never felt the need to smoke(up either) or drink, even with friends, despite the slight out of place feeling. I've never smoked a puff of anything in my life, though I admit my lungs are probably blacker than most chain smokers due to the second hand smoke, and I've rarely had a drink, and probably never a whole glass of anything alcoholic, not even a breezer.
I honestly don't feel like I'm missing out on anything, and I don't even feel the need to do it. I don't mind being the designated driver, and I've carried enough drunk people in, or tossed them into the various recovery positions, having done a course in first aid.

I still don't find myself judging people who do. True, some could certainly do with a little control, going well over their limits, repeatedly, but it's their life, their choices, their losses. I'll certainly step in and suggest they hold off, and yes, I would perhaps change my opinion of them if they overdid it time and again, but the mere fact that it's their own life choice prevents me from forcing them to do or not do anything.
I know this may come off as pimping myself here, but that's always been my view of things, and how they've petered out in my life. I admit I haven't seen that many years, but nothing has made me resort to such escapes, and I'm glad you realized it wasn't an adequate escape for you dear. :)

a blue eyed girl said...

wha a great post! i love when fellow bloggers share stories of their lives so honestly. i used to drink quite often in my late teens and early 20's, but soon grew tired of the next day hangovers. i smoked pot only once and i became so paranoid i hid under a table because i thought someone was coming to kill me! :) thanks for sharing! cheers!

utopia said...

drama diva i use to be the sober one for too long. got quite monotonous after a while heheh!

parents do seem much more amicable once we grow up :).

anjan thanks for visiting :).

raaji i know exactly how that would feel. i said the same at 19. don't know when but i changed.

wacko i ain't no weedster heheh! just a time in my life.

anansi u r so correct. men so love attaching tags to women. i've been blogging regularly. u stopped writing in the middle for sometime right!glad you are back :).

renovatio well guess i'd admire you for being a teetotler. i was one for a very longtime. then i changed, life changed.... though i have no regrets. i made my own choices and had to bear the brunt of them. we live and learn. if i hadn't tried out maybe i'd always have had that regret that i lived my life as miss goody two shoes. but its all good now :).

blue eyed girl thank you. yeah sometimes it is kind of hard to come up with personal experiences maybe cos ppl judge u. like this post makes me sound so jaded, been there done that kinds. but i'd like to think that i am not :).

utopia said...

rajeev that parents comment was for you.

Pri said...

whoaa!! does it really help u get past things??hmm
makes me wanna try it weed..booze..everythin! heehee...:p
but am too afraid of tht hollow empty feelin u been speakin bout

She said...

wine is your poison??? wow!! you sure are an expensive date!!

Evil Spock said...

I like to drink on occasion, and only in social situations. I can't drink by myself; its no fun.

I smoked weed in college, and a little bit afterwards, but I always felt paranoid, and I didn't like that I binged on really bad foods.

I've tried some other stuff, but nothing too serious. Social drinking is the only thing I do now, and I really don't care to experiment any further.

cj° said...

nice and true and apt :)